Sunday was my turn for an outing, and I’ll give you three clues where I most wanted to go. I love movies, and I love anything Marvel, and —well, heck with it, two clues are enough! I asked Miss Chrissy and Mr. Russ to take me to the new Ant-Man movie at an actual movie theater!
Now, I’ve seen lots of lots of movies, watching them on the TV screen in Whimsieville, but I have never in my life been to an actual movie theater, so I was extremely curious to see what it would be like. The first thing I knew was that there would be no need whatsoever to “dress up.” Going to the movie theater is all about enjoying yourself, and being comfortable, and what could be more comfortable than this soft tee shirt and oversized pair of pants? I also added a light jacket, because Miss Chrissy told me that sometimes they’ve got the air conditioner running FULL BLAST in the theater, and you can actually feel ice cold, even though it might be the hottest day of the year.
Well, Sunday was just about the hottest day of the year so far, but after a drive in the air-conditioned car, we arrived…at the convenience store?? What??? Yes, you see, Miss Chrissy always has this idea that it’s cheaper to buy your movie candy at a store than actually at the movie 
theater, where it tends to be very, very expensive. (Once inside the movie theater, I scoped out the situation quickly and discovered that Miss Chrissy is absolutely right! Who in their right mind would pay $3.25 for a $1.00 Snickers bar??)
I kind of got the idea from hearing Miss Chrissy and Mr. Russ talking about movie candy that he is very much of the mind that even though it might be cheaper to buy candy at a store, bringing it into the movie theater is not exactly right or proper. Mr. Russ kept telling Miss Chrissy that if she got caught with the “outside candy” and was THROWN OUT of the movie theater, he wasn’t going to stop watching the movie, she would just have to wait for him in the lobby. I wasn’t sure if he was serious or not, because the whole time he was saying this, he was sort of laughing and smiling. I got the idea this was an ongoing joke between the two of them, but the whole idea of being THROWN OUT of a movie theater freaked me out so much that when we went into the convenience store to buy the candy, I didn’t want to be any part of it. So I just hid inside my traveling bag while Miss Chrissy chose the candy (Twizzlers and Kit Kats), hoping that nobody would see us and catch on to what we were doing.
Well! At last we were out of there, and finally on our way to the theater! We were going to an afternoon showing, also known as a “matinee,” which is just fine by me, though I think I would have liked to see this movie “marquee” behind me all lit up. They tell me it’s got about a dozen different colored neon lights, and is quite a spectacle against the night sky. It would have been nice to see that.
But then, I wasn’t there to see a movie marquee, I was there to see a MOVIE! As we got our tickets, Miss Chrissy asked if there would be a charge for a Whimsie, but when the cashier looked in the bag and saw me, I gave her my biggest, sweetest smile, and she smiled right back and said, “No, no, go right ahead.” That was awfully nice of her, don’t you think?
We stopped at the concession stand for sodas (again, I say: Terribly overpriced!) and a little bit of popcorn, because what’s a movie without popcorn? At least that’s what Miss Chrissy said, though personally, I’m not really a fan. Unless it’s caramel coated popcorn, like Cracker Jacks! I tried a little popcorn, just to be polite, but butter and salt really don’t interest a Whimsie much at all. (Yuck!)
So we go into the theater, and there are a thousand seats, and since we got there early, we could sit anywhere we liked. Miss Chrissy and Mr. Russ always like to sit on the end of a row, about a third of the way up, and that’s exactly what we did. And sat down in the funny chairs that kept wanting to pop up. Well, not for Miss Chrissy and Mr. Russ, they were absolutely fine on those silly seats, but I couldn’t seem to keep mind down! I guess I simply don’t weigh enough. Finally Miss Chrissy added her purse and the extra sweaters, and I climbed on top of that soft pile and managed to get myself situated just perfectly, ready to see my first movie theater movie!
First, we had to wait, and it seemed like a very, very long time. As we waited, more and more people kept coming in and sitting down. Pretty soon, the theater was mostly full, and to tell you the truth, it was actually a little scary for me, being so small, and so cute, because I was sort of afraid that some bad person might want to wait until all the lights were out, and in the darkness they would reach out and grab me and whisk me away! Hey! It happens sometimes. But Miss Chrissy could tell I was getting nervous, and I think she knew why, so she took my hand, and didn’t let go of it for the entire movie, and then I felt much better and much safer.
So, finally the lights go down, somewhat, and then, before the movie starts, there are commercials—can you believe it?? I had no idea. And then, there are “Coming Attractions,” of other movies they’re showing or planning to show, which are very big and sort of scary, because there is so much going on so quickly, and it’s very, very loud, and by this time the whole movie theater is very, very dark, and you’re just there, in the middle of it, feeling so small.
Finally, the screen goes black, and it’s completely dark, and completely quiet, except for one or two people who are still playing around with their cell phones even though the rules clearly state that you must turn your cell phones OFF when you’re in the theater. (The rules also state that you cannot take any pictures while in the movie theater, which is why there are no pictures of me sitting on my big pile of sweaters on that silly pop-up seat, though I surely would have loved to have a picture like that.) (The picture I used earlier, of the empty movie theater, is not actually the movie theater we went to. It’s just something I found on the internet to show how big and empty a movie theater can look when there’s nobody in it. Maybe somebody else got in trouble for taking that picture, but not us!)
Anyway, I’m beginning to wonder if these few inconsiderate people who can’t seem to wean themselves off their cell phones are going to ruin the entire experience for me and everyone else there, but then…
But then…
The screen comes awake again, and it’s those flickering comic book images that let you know you’re about to see one of the most entertaining bits of entertainment you could ever think possible, because you’re about to see a 
MARVEL MOVIE, and once I saw that, I felt all warm and fuzzy inside, and I didn’t care anything about anyone else who was around me, except for Miss Chrissy, who was still holding my hand, and Mr. Russ, who was sitting on my other side, smiling to beat the band.
So! Soon enough the movie starts, and I get drawn into it, and almost forget who I am, I’m just living in that Marvelous World where everything is literally “bigger than life.” I’m glad I sat through the “Coming Attractions” first, because it sort of got me ready for the actual movie, made me more used to how big and bold and loud everything is so that it didn’t scare me anymore, it just fascinated me, and drew me in, more and more.
So, I guess I should say a few words about Ant-Man, the move, but since it’s so NEW, I wouldn’t want to spoil anyone who hasn’t seen it yet, and might be reading this. I will tell you this much, though: this movie is PURE ENTERTAINMENT. It’s got everything you want to see in a movie: there’s action and adventure, plenty and plenty of funny moments, and also some very sad and
touching elements that just about make you want to cry. I’ve seen all the other Marvel movies, at home in Whimsieville, on our much smaller screen, so it may come off sounding a bit ironic when I tell you that even though I saw Ant-Man on the “Big Screen,” in many, many ways it’s a much smaller movie than any of the other Marvel movies. Oh! What did I just say? Ant-Man is a “smaller” movie? LOL! I wasn’t trying to be funny, but it is sort of funny, isn’t it?
What I mean is that this movie has a much smaller cast, and the people in the movies have much more real and personal problems than…oh…let’ say THOR, who is a GOD, whose wicked stepbrother wants to destroy EVERYTHING. No, instead, in Ant-Man, it’s just about one man learning to be a superhero and fighting a single super-villain (who is really just a guy in pretty cool “costume”). It’s about trying to remake your life and be better than you were before. It’s about people overcoming the things in their past that have hurt them and kept them apart from the people they love. Oh, stop! I’m going to make myself cry just thinking about it!
Well, that’s all I’m going to say about Ant-Man, except to mention that I was so absorbed in the movie, that after a while I completely forgot to look for Stan Lee to make his customary “cameo appearance,” so when he did, it caught me by surprise. That’s the sign of a good movie, isn’t it? When you forget all about who you are and where you are and what you’re afraid of and what you’re hoping to see, and then suddenly you reconnect to reality and say, “Oh yeah! Right! It’s ONLY a movie.”
After the movie there were a couple of little “post-credit” scenes (actually, one was in the middle of the credits, and the other was at the very end of the credits) and Miss Chrissy and Mr. Russ kept shaking their heads at all the silly people in the theater who kept getting up and leaving before the movie was completely over. Why do they do that? It’s a mystery. You would think if they care enough about Marvel movies to come out and see one on the opening weekend, they would know enough to stay to the very end for the big surprise.
The big surprise at the end…well, no. I won’t tell you. I wouldn’t want to spoil it for you. I’ll just say that seeing these two extra scenes I got very excited about what might be coming next in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.
I’m only a little Whimsie, but I feel completely comfortable using huge phrases like “Marvel Cinematic Universe.” And now that I’ve seen an actual movie in an actual movie theater, I can’t WAIT to come back and see more! What’s next? Fantastic Four? Maybe I can convince Miss Chrissy and Mr. Russ to take me out to the movies again for that one!
I certainly hope so, but if not, at the very least, I would love to come back to the theater to see something like this: an IMAX show about being in outer space! How cool would that be? Talk about BIG and SCARY.
But I promise I won’t be scared. At least not as long as I can sit between my People, and Miss Chrissy will hold my hand.
